The range of emotions you can feel in the course of a relationship is almost unbearable, in both the best and worst ways. It’s terrifying to let another person dictate your happiness, your frustration and your sadness, but without risk, there can be no love.
There is one emotion you should never be made to feel, though.
In no romantic setting should anyone ever make you feel crazy. And by crazy, we mean irrational, ridiculous, desperate or absurd. No one likes to feel out of control or separated from reality, but being called crazy is a surefire way to get there.Remember that if you feel crazy, it’s because someone made you feel that way.
Your best friends don’t make you feel crazy. They might call you out on being a little irrational, but it’s always with love—it’s never accusatory. Your family might drive you crazy, but they don’t make you feel ridiculous because you expect a normal amount of human contact.
So when he calls you crazy, and he’s doing it to reestablish control in the relationship or to make you feel small or to excuse the inconsiderate way he’s been treating you, you need to set some ground rules or just get out. Fast.
You don’t deserve to be accused of fulfilling some stereotype that isn’t true. Girls are not crazy. In fact, no one should ever say that “Girls are…” anything because there is no way to categorize half of the entire human race.
We are all just people, and people feel vulnerable in relationships. If someone tries to exploit that vulnerability, they don’t deserve your time.
Calling someone crazy is just a way to undercut the value of another person’s thoughts and emotions. No one deserves to feel that their emotions aren’t valid. You can’t help how you feel, and someone who truly cares about you would want to make you feel good. Someone who truly cares about you would want to apologize for making you feel badly, especially if their choices or actions played a role in your emotions.
If he’s not willing to admit that he’s the one who made you feel crazy for ignoring your texts or wanting to “play it by ear,” then you deserve better. End of story.
Feature Photo via Tumblr